Speaking Out requires courage and it requires building up confidence. Even when it’s necessary it might come across as sheer impossible. This is the result of things which have been said to us in the past and/or things we experienced when we did speak out and ran into some highly uncomfortable situations. Those situations have taught us that we might as well keep quiet, because it’s no use to do otherwise.
It’s about not feeling heard, not being listened to, the lack of respect experienced when you still spoke out and expected results. It’s about giving up, giving in and not wanting to lose face. It’s about not being up for a battle, an instant loss of energy and once more sheer disappointment. It’s about wanting to keep your own emotions in check, so you want take it out on yourself and even worse on others who likely didn’t deserve it, having nothing to do with what happened.
Of course, not everything listed above needs to apply to your situation. But a lot of it could and most likely will.
Now let’s watch the video for a moment. It is a long one. Take a break if needed and make notes along the way. Watch it a few times and also go over your notes a few times, adding and/or adjusting them as feel appropriate to you.
In the beginning of the video I explain how I Speak Out even though I may seem silent.
- Which ways are there for you to Speak Out (in silence)?
- What can you do in order to Speak Out if you need to wait till you can and be efficient at doing so?
- Speak Out when there are only a few people around. Plan it. Next be specific, listen and check and if needed adjust.
- Observe what you do and observe your thoughts. What could you have done differently.
- Observe how others perceived what you wanted to get across. Observe how others acting after you spoke out about what you wanted and needed and how any differences may have come to existence.
- Observe if you feel okay with your own actions.
When you are going to make the choice about speaking out yes or no, it’s about gain versus loss. It’s about physical health versus emotional drainage. It’s about courage versus fear or simply being so depressed there’s nothing left to draw any energy from.
Here’s the rub. It won’t change unless you muster up that courage and that’s very hard next to sheer impossible to do on your own. Please note that it is possible if you have enough reasons and motivation to do it. To keep doing so is an entirely different story UNLESS you actually had some positive results you can look back on.
The other thing which is essential is getting support. That’s why I’m setting up a community where you can share your thoughts with others. Coaching is a more direct way to get you moving in the right direction and to keep yourself (more) accountable. If you reach out to me, you can get a free coaching session, worth $197. This will help you get clarity and hence moving in the right direction.
Remember: Only by observing yourself, you will get the answers you need to be able to make a decision.